Most people try to fix internal emotional pain by changing the external world—pursuing success, relationships, or possessions. But as a psychiatrist specializing in integrative approaches to anxiety, depression, and PTSD, I see how this often backfires. Cognitive defusion and self-compassion offer a proven path to change how you feel from the inside out. What is the likelihood of success in solving this internal challenge when all of one's attention is on the external world?

The Challenge The power to heal lies within all of us. As children, we are conditioned to look and act in the outside world to change how we feel. We do this in the belief that at some point in the future, when a certain set of conditions are met (such as "when this person does that" or "when I have this"), we will finally "be happy." This approach is a setup for suffering. It is a trap that ensnares almost everyone, as, in the words of Henry David Thoreau, "most people lead